Thursday, December 31, 2009

Quit with the Free Mayo Already

Dear Kroger,

While I am deeply grateful that you send me coupons in the mail, several of which are for completely free items, I do not think I can handle another free jar of mayonnaise. Your past two mailings have included coupons for free jars of Miracle Whip. The problem is, all of your jars of mayo expire in March. I waited. I kept returning to your store to check the expiration dates on your mayo. March 2010. March 2010. March 2010. How do you expect me to use up two large jars of mayo in the next two or three months?

In your next mailing, feel free to include a free coupon on something like cheese or bread. I go through these items quickly. Mayo- not so much. Today, in an effort to use up some of Mayo Jar #1, I whipped up some tuna salad and some tartar sauce. Said tartar sauce went beautifully with the $1.99 tilapia I purchased at your store during my last visit. I also have several jars of pickles from a recent grocery trip when I went a little nutso got excited at your pickles on clearance. Too bad hubby doesn't eat pickles. He also doesn't eat fish or seafood. Looks like I'll be eating lots of tuna salad and tartar sauce while my dear husband starves to death.

Please, for the sake of my marriage, do not send me another Miracle Whip coupon. You know I have a special weakness for all things free and would not be able to turn it down. You know I hate wastefulness and so I would be stuck trying to use up yet another jar of mayo. A girl can only eat so much mayo.



P.S. It would also be helpful if in your next mailer you were able to include some delicious recipes using said Miracle Whip. It would be even better if those recipes did not involve pickles or seafood so that my husband doesn't wither away to nothing. I have heard about cake recipes that utilize mayo- this I am willing to try (for my husband of course). Also, baconnaise is a new concept to me that I just might have to give a whirl. If you have any outstanding recipes like these, please send them my way. Thank you.

P.P.S. Happy New Year!

No comments:

Post a Comment